most funny quotes on religion

The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion

― Fred Allen
most funny quotes

I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure

― Tommy Cooper

most funny quotes on doctors

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too
― Rodney Dangerfield
sports funny quotes

I failed to make the chess team because of my height

― Woody Allen
most funny quotes on age

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter

― Mark Twain

Short and most funny quotes

I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying

― Oscar Wilde
most funny quotes on money

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair

― Sam Ewing
very Short funny quotes

Now I started remembering why I dont remember anything!

― Homer Simpson
most funny quotes on education

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education

― Mark Twain
funny quotes on experience

Experience is the comb life gives you after you lose your hair.

― Judith Stern
most funny quotes

My advice to you is to get married. If you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not you'll become a philosopher

― Socrates
funny quotes about age

The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything

― Oscar Wilde
most funny quotes

My father was stupid. He worked in a bank and they caught him stealing pens

― Rodney Dangerfield
most funny quotes

Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning

― George W. Bush
very funny quotes

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own

― Les Dawson
most funny quotes

It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man

― H. L. Mencken
very funny quotes

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back

― Oscar Wilde
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